The Most Painful Four Minutes of TV

At the top of my list of awkward film/TV moments is this scene from Swingers, in which Jon Favreau's character fills up the answering machine of a lovely lady whose digits he'd only received that evening.


But that's fiction. The new #1 is reality. Apparently reading sports highlights is far more difficult than one would imagine. Force yourself to watch the entire clip, as the response from the anchors when they go to commercial break is priceless.


I was reminded of this clip on Doug Richards' Live Apartment Fire blog. A long-time Atlanta TV reporter, Richards excels at sharing his insightful and humorous perspective of local news.

TOTUS

Much has been written of TOTUS, the Teleprompter of the United States. It has its own blog and Twitter accounts, even an official seal. A key role in President Obama's speech at the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Fox News released this three-minute piece introducing TOTUS, and reminding us how things really work in DC.


If only Vice-President Joe Biden would stay ON the teleprompter:

Tax cuts in beer language

This one is making the rounds again, but is worth a second read. Will the "takers" in America discover only too late that the achievers have moved on, or have simply stopped achieving? Then what?

A brilliant explanation of our tax system using actual percentages, the impact of a tax cut, and the public reaction that even Obama should be able to understand:

Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this:

The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18.
The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.

So, that's what they decided to do. The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve. "Since you are all such good customers," he said, "I'm going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20. "Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.

The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes, so the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free. But what about the other six men - the paying customers? How could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share?'

They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33. But if they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer. So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay.

And so...

The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 ( 22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $ 59 (16% savings).

Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free. But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings.

"I only got a dollar out of the $20," declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man,"but he got $10!"

"Yeah, that's right," exclaimed the fifth man. "I only saved a dollar, too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I!"

"That's true!" shouted the seventh man. "Why should he get $10 back when I got only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!"

"Wait a minute," yelled the first four men in unison. "We didn't get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!"

The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up. The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks, so the nine sat down and had beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important. They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!

And that, boys and girls, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up anymore. In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.

Check out GeoffAchison.org

Find more music like this on Geoff Achison Fan Club

Find more music like this on Geoff Achison Fan Club

Barack Obama will hurt growing businesses

In the first post of this series, I discussed how Senator Obama’s proposed tax increases would affect a small business during startup phase. The financial case one makes when determining if a startup is even feasible would be heavily burdened by Mr. Obama’s tax increases, leaving many potential businesses to stall in the ideation phase. Fewer small businesses means fewer jobs. Provided an entrepreneur forges ahead despite these challenges, self-funded growth would be further hampered by Mr. Obama’s proposed increase of capital gains and dividend taxes, and his failure to understand that many small business owners include business income on their personal tax returns, making them seem like individual high earners, even though the expenses often eclipse revenues at first.

This post centers on the growth stage, when a business starts hopping. Expenses are often highest, as the concept has proven out and investments in marketing and infrastructure can be heavy. Senator McCain proposes expensing equipment and technology investments in the first year, rather than amortizing over many years. This simple change should boost capital spending and more quickly reward businesses that make these investments.

The growth stage typically involves hiring, which tremendously benefits the community. Senator Obama’s plan to increase the minimum wage will make it more difficult to justify lower-skilled positions, leading to higher unemployment. These positions are often filled by younger people just entering the workforce, hoping to gain valuable experience to help them land their next, better job. Unfortunately for the next generation of workers, anti-free market minimum wages will delay their progress.

Senator Obama also intends to burden business owners with a “pay or play” scheme, in which they must provide health insurance for employees or pay a fine up to $12,000 per year per employee. This mandate will certainly result in fewer new jobs, a greater reliance on contract labor, and stunted business growth. When the costs of adding people are so high, many businesses will opt to delay or forgo expansion opportunities.


To summarize, Senator Obama’s naïve proposals will harm growth-phase businesses in many ways:

• Investment in growing the business reduced because tax burden on individual filers will jump.
• Hiring postponed or canceled due to higher, artificial minimum wages, and huge penalties for not provided mandated health insurance.
• Capital spending would increase under Senator McCain’s plan to allowing expensing of such investments in year one.

Look for a continuation of this theme in my next post.

McCain campaign event for small businesses

Recently I joined Senator John McCain’s Georgia Small Business Leaders steering committee, and this morning I participated in a press briefing organized by the McCain campaign, with the objective of highlighting the differences between the candidates' economic plans. As this was my first speech of this sort, I asked the campaign folks for guidance. They urged me to personalize the suggested talking points.

As it turns out this was not difficult. Over the next few posts I'll discuss the issues that directly affect my small business, beginning with the basic philosophy of the role of government.

Thankfully starting a business in Georgia isn't hard. The secretary of state makes it easy to register an LLC, and even the IRS simplified obtaining an employer identification number. My business doesn't require a special license, which can be onerous to obtain in some states. I share Senator McCain's belief that the best government is a small government, whereas I have yet to learn of a program or policy proposed by Barack Obama that doesn't involve government growth.

While planning the start-up phase of my business, I understood that my income would drop substantially from my previous corporate gig. To help bridge that gap I’m depending on income from my investments, which are taxed as capital gains. Senator McCain will maintain the current taxes on capital gains, while phasing out the AMT (alternative minimum tax). Senator Obama, on the other hand, has proposed increasing not just capital gains and dividend taxes, but income taxes, Social Security taxes, energy taxes, and business taxes.

The increased burden of Senator Obama’s proposed tax increases would A) make it much more difficult for potential owners to make the financial case of starting their own businesses, and B) reduce the money available for existing owners to invest back in their businesses.

How important are small businesses? In Georgia alone there are ~860,000 small businesses, and these are responsible for an astonishing 98% of all jobs in the state. Senator Obama’s proposal to nearly double the capital gains tax would clearly hurt the 618,000 Georgians who reported capital gains income in 2006.

Taxes aren’t painless, esoteric nuisances that affect only the wealthy. They directly impact business owners’ ability to reinvest in and grow their businesses, and small businesses are responsible for the majority of job growth in this country.

In future posts I’ll note how the proposals of Senators McCain and Obama influence other aspects of small businesses.

NASCAR at Talladega

Wedding slideshow

Think you can take me down?

Link: PlayMyGame

New Zealand - Milford Sound, Fox Glacier, and the Pancake Rocks of Punakaiki

Zombies on Vuvox

Mike Vick smuggling pot? Really.

Since this skit aired Vick was cleared of suspicion, but not of exceptionally poor judgement. Arthur Blank must be so proud of his investment...

Which Superhero are you?

The results of my "Which Superhero are you" quiz from TheSuperHeroQuiz.com (that's right, I'm an inventor, businessman, and genius!):

Your results:
You are Iron Man

Iron Man 70% Spider-Man 60% The Flash 60% Green Lantern 60% Superman 55% Supergirl 45% Robin 45% Catwoman 35% Wonder Woman 30% Batman 20% Hulk 20%

Inventor. Businessman. Genius.

Click here to take the Superhero Personality Quiz

First the Superhero, now the Supervillain

Your results:
You are Lex Luthor

Lex Luthor 63% Apocalypse 60% Dr. Doom 59% Kingpin 57% Riddler 56% Juggernaut 52% Magneto 50% The Joker 45% Green Goblin 36% Mr. Freeze 32% Dark Phoenix 30% Venom 27% Catwoman 20% Mystique 20% Poison Ivy 19% Two-Face 0%

A brilliant businessman on a quest for world domination and the self-proclaimed greatest criminal mind of our time!

Click here to take the Supervillain Personality Quiz

Damon's dead-on impersonation of McConaughey

On Monday's Late Show with David Letterman Matt Damon absolutely nails his impersonation of Matthew McConaughey. 

That Damon has grown into quite a fine actor.  Interesting to contrast his career path with that of Ben Affleck, huh?  Per IMDB, Damon is currently filming The Bourne Ultimatum after finishing up Ocean's Thirteen, while Affleck is slowly recovering from Gigli, Paycheck, and Jersey Girl. (In his defense, Smokin' Aces looks entertaining).

Welcome to the big leagues, Jane Skinner

Jane Skinner, welcome to Shepardville.  Skinner, who contributes her "Skinnerville" segment to Shepard Smith's "Studio B with Shepard Smith" program on Fox News Channel, made the studio crew (and anyone watching) laugh out loud with this blooper:

Even funnier than Skinner's goof was Smith's reaction.  Talk about self-awareness!  Shep has a bit of experience in this area, too, having committed one of the biggest blunders in recent newcast history:

One more funny note about Skinner's slip: the last time I played her blooper, one of the two videos served up by YouTube's recommendation engine was Joe Cocker singing "Help From My Friends."   Hopefully Google's smart programmers improve that algorithm.

I rock for an old guy

So I was told by my 17-year-old future step cousin in law.

Thanksgiving day, following the devastation of two turkeys and all the fixin's one could want (but before the food coma set in), Hector and I snuck down to the basement to jump on Xbox Live.  He's recently focused on leveling up as a Halo 2 sniper, and I thought I could join him without bringing shame upon myself.  Hey, I've spent a good bit of time with Halo.  I'm not *that* old.  I can hang, right?

Sorta.  Hector's sniping skills (along with those of his team mates) were far above mine, but I did OK in the general carnage games.  Indeed, in one bout of slayer, I picked up a rocket launcher, then jumped from one platform to another, landing right behind an opponent.  At that moment I realized I was out of ammo, which Hector also realized as he was waiting to respawn.  This old warrior didn't panic, however -- I just took a few steps forward, pressed the B button twice, and used the trusty melee skills to take care of the bad guy.

That move prompted the "you rock for an old guy" praise (at least, I think it was praise), and gave me enough pride to surive another hour of humiliation.  By that time I was ready for dessert.

Real-life Spinal Tap

One can probably tell from the Underground Garage photo album to the right that I've listened to Little Steven's Sirius channel a good bit recently.  One of the bands currently touring is the New York Dolls.  Not knowing much about them, I checked out their AllMusic.com bio, and was fascinated by a story that makes This Is Spinal Tap tame by comparison.

To summarize the bio, two guitarists, a bassist, drummer, and vocalist form the band in late 1971.   By early 1972 guitarist #2 was replaced by guitarist #3.  Late in 1972, drummer #1 died after mixing drugs and alcohol whilst touring in England, and was replace by drummer #2.  Producer #1 works on album #1 in 1973, which received strong reviews but didn't sell much.  Hoping to turn around their fortunes, the band works with producer #2 on album #2, which, like the one before it, failed to stir much public interest upon its release in 1974.

After two commercial failures, the band is dropped by label #1.  So manager #2, in an attempt to garner publicity, dresses the group in red leather and has them pose in front of USSR flags.  Surprisingly, this tactic fails to woo labels and the public, so, in 1975, guitarist #1 and drummer #2 leave the band. 

The remaining members give it a go with various fillers for the next two years, but, in 1977, they disband for good.  Separately, guitarist #2 and vocalist #1 work together on a few projects, as do guitarist #1 and drummer #2.  The latter partnership ended in 1991, when guitarist #1 ("one of the more notorious drug abusers in rock & roll history") dies of a heroin overdose.  Later that year, a few months after performing a benefit concert for guitarist #1, drummer #2 dies of a stroke at age 40.

Fast forward to 2004.  A popular artist, who was once president of the British New York Dolls fan club, invites the remaining members to perform at a festival.  Shocking many, bassist #1, guitarist #2, and vocalist #1 agree.  The gig was very well received, and thoughts of a renaissance arose.  Alas, within a few weeks of the festival bassist #1 dies of leukimia, after checking in to the hospital only hours before with what he thought was the flu.

More of the New York Dolls' story at Wikipedia.

Rock violin?

No, not Dave Stewart.  Classic, unplugged, wonderful violin.  Playing AC/DC, Led Zeppelin, Rush, and Van Halen. 

That's what we witnessed Saturday evening at Eddie's Attic.  Initially we went to see Robert Henson, Deidre's brother, on the upright base (is there a cooler instrument?).  Rob rocked, as usual, but we had no idea how good his band would be.  Rob's band is actually Bobby Yang's project, and Bobby is the wild man on violin.  It's difficult to find words that describe his playing, so see and hear it for yourself, and experience him the next chance you get.

As a drummer since the age of seven, I tend to focus on the guy behind the kit, and Bobby Yang found Mark Cobb, who's damn talented.  Worked through "Tom Sawyer" cleanly, which is a feat. 

In our location near the bar we chatted a bit (between songs, of course -- this was Eddie's Attic!) with a couple next to us.  I didn't catch the bloke's name, but he's in a Weezer tribute band.  Read that again.  A Weezer tribute band.  That's either a sign that a band has made it, or a sign of the apocalypse.  (I understand the attraction, however, as Weezer's style is straightforward, fun rock.)  If I could find the talent I'd start a Zombies tribute project...

YouTube valuation

A colleague asked for my thoughts regarding the seemingly high price for YouTube paid by Google. My short answer was that Google obviously places an extraordinary value on Internet video.  When prompted for reasons for YouTube's success, I responded with:
1. It’s easy to upload videos to YouTube.
2. It’s easy to embed links to YouTube videos in your website/blog post/email.
3. There are no ads.
4. It’s free.
5. Copyright protection is limited to safe harbor aspect of DMCA, meaning by the time the take-down notice is issued the video is stale and/or replicated elsewhere.
6. MySpace didn’t offer an alternative, so their users quickly gravitated to YouTube for reasons 1-5.

My colleague responded that he absolutely agrees, especially with 1&2.  His usability crusade is bolstered by the success of YouTube, and the material results ($1.6B is damn material!) of focusing on usability.  Hopefully this will continue, as the YouTube founders are relieved that they can now focus on features and functionality, and leave the operational issues to others.

Lifetime dream fulfilled

My sister Sue is five years my senior, and introduced me to a number of cool bands during her college (my high school) days. One break -- Thanksgiving 1983, I believe -- she brought home a tape of The Zombies.  (Tapes are what we listened to in suitcase-sized Walkmen, back when Sony ruled the portable music world.)

The tape was a mix, made up mostly of tracks from Odessey and Oracle.  I dug it immediately.  Since then I've stuck with the group, listening to everything I could get my hands on and introducing the band to friends who dig music from the British Invasion era. 

A few years ago Colin Blunstone (vocals) and Rod Argent (keyboards, composer) reunited, touring the UK and even dashing over to the US for a bit.  Unaware of this, I missed the US dates, and nearly flew to England for a week filled with The Zombies and the Goodwood Festival of Speed.  Circumstances conspired against me, however, and I remained in the universe of frustrated fans who'd not yet witnessed a live show.

Until last night.  The Zombies rolled into town as part of Little Steven's Underground Garage tour, and I was front and center.  (Probably the only person under 50 who knew all the words.)  Colin's voice is a bit harder than before, but, well, he's 62.  Looked damn stylish in his Nehru jacket, too.  They played many of the songs I wished to hear, with the glaring exception of Walking in the Sun.  Rod might have enjoyed his interminable keyboard solos a bit too much, but that's a small price for us to pay.  Some may even like Hold Your Head Up enough to justify its Low Spark for High-Heeled Boys-like duration.  Bryan from The Forty Fives kinda obtained Colin's and Rod's autographs for me, which are awaiting an appropriate frame.

Speaking of Bryan, he and his mates in The Forty Fives were fantastic, as were gents from The Mooney Suzuki.  (The base was cranked so high for the latter that not only did my chest rumble on one and three, but my nostrils vibrated as well.  Now that's sound pressure.)  If need be, push nuns out of your way if the opportunity arises to see either band.

I can sleep peacefully now.

Pandora

Have you played with Pandora yet?  At the urging of a colleague I gave it go tonight, and am bowled over.

What is Pandora?  I’ll crib this description from the FAQ: “Pandora is a music discovery service designed to help you find and enjoy music that you’ll love.  It’s powered by the Music Genome Project, the most comprehensive analysis of music ever undertaken.  Just tell us one of your favorite songs or artists and we’ll launch a streaming station to explore that part of the music universe.”

So I chose The Zombies, my all-time favorite band.  Then Pandora played a song that represents that band – how it knew A Rose For Emily is among my favorites I’ll never know.  It was kinda creepy.

After giving that song a thumbs-up, I listened to Pursuit, by The Souls of Inspyration, a band with which I’m not familiar.  Why this song?  “Based on what you’ve told us so far, we’re playing this track because it features a subtle use of paired vocal harmony, mild rhythmic syncopation, mixed acoustic and electric instrumentation, paired vocal harmony [sic] and melodic songwriting.”  Spot on!

Next up were The Who’s 1921, Smell of Incense by Southwest F.O.B., and Rock Me On The Water by Jackson Browne, all of which received thumbs-up from me.  I didn’t care much for Brian Wilson’s Wonderful, mostly due to his shaky voice.  As soon as I voted thumbs-down, Pandora played the next song: Grey and Black by Tempest.

Just to give you an idea of the depth of the catalog, here’re the songs suggested thus far for my Zombies station:
Christmas, Your Humble Suitor
Fresh Air, I’ve Lost My Faith
The Status Quo, Pictures of Matchstick Men
The Zombies, Beechwood Park (another favorite!)
Hunger, Open Your Eyes

After Pictures of Matchstick Men I was prompted to register for continued free access, which I promptly did.  This seems a small sacrifice for such a valuable service.

As one who constantly discovers new music using Rhapsody (disclaimer: my employer recently signed a Rhapsody distribution deal with RealNetworks), I’m always looking for smart recommendations.  Rhapsody’s catalog includes some 1.3 million tracks, compared with Pandora’s 300,000.  Yet the latter recommended artists I’ve never seen on Rhapsody, but you can bet I’ll now look.

So how will Pandora survive?  Clicking on each song spawns a small menu that enables users to buy the track from iTunes or the album from Amazon.  Also, there’s a tower ad in the right rail (right now it’s for iTunes).  Users can subscribe to an ad-free version for $36/year.

Rest assured I’ll comment on Pandora more later – right now I’m just enjoying The Raspberries. 

Network neutrality

"Network neutrality" is a concept that's getting a lot of play in certain circles, especially those designed by L'Enfant. The idea is that Internet service providers (ISPs) should be prevented by law from discriminating against any Internet content or source, and that consumers have full say in how they use the Internet.

Recently, however, a few large ISPs -- notably BellSouth and AT&T (formerly SBC) -- have stated they’re investigating charging content providers based on volume of traffic and/or quality of service. This could include charging, say, Movielink to deliver its movies faster than normal, or video game hosts for a lower-latency experience. These issues and others are discussed in a recent article in the WSJ (subscription required). Both BellSouth and AT&T have committed to not blocking any content providers.

We all know this isn’t true, however, and we should thank ISPs for blocking some content. (Disclaimer: My employer is a large ISP/cable company; these opinions are mine only, and do not reflect the official position of this company.) Viruses, trojans, worms, and spam are among the content currently blocked by most ISPs. Some block phishing attempts, too. Yet few consumer groups howl in protest.

Paying for performance on the Internet makes a lot of sense. While its origins are as a government-funded network, the vast majority of investment over the past few decades has been private, at-risk capital. Why shouldn’t the shareholders of AT&T, BellSouth, and others expect to be paid for using these assets? Why should consumers shoulder the burden, as they do now (last I checked, Amazon and the WSJ don’t contribute to my Comcast bill)? If content providers wish to differentiate their products, and consumers are willing to fund this premium, why shouldn’t ISPs develop the mechanisms to do so?

The market will severely punish any who misbehave. For example, should AT&T block access to Google because the latter wouldn’t pay for bandwidth costs, AT&T’s DSL subscribers would flock to cable.

This concept isn’t so foreign. Many commuters pay to travel on limited-access turnpikes, or pay to use a “cruise card” thus avoiding stopping at tollbooths. Why, then, are those purporting to be advocating for consumers up in arms over the potential creation of a market for Internet turnpikes?

Thus far all the attention has been focused on DSL and cable companies, mostly due to the statements from AT&T and BellSouth. What I’ve not yet seen, however, are similar network neutrality demands placed on wireless carriers. One should marvel at the tight-fisted control the carriers have maintained over their networks. At what point do public interest groups and lawmakers decide these carriers are essentially utilities, and attempt to enact such legislation?

Really, what are the differences between a cable company’s HFC plant and the wireless networks? Both were built with private capital. Both are used for a growing number of communications and entertainment services. One could make the argument that since the wireless networks use public spectrum (admittedly carriers paid dearly for their licenses), the public has even more rights to these networks. Where are the demands that cable companies frequently see in franchise negotiations, such as bandwidth for public use? Given the communications problems public safety officials experience in times of emergency (e.g., 9/11, Katrina), one would think there would be an even greater demand for public use of the carriers’ private networks.

But this hasn’t happened. Yet. And it shouldn’t. Let consumers decide who gets their business, and ISPs will make network decisions based on this environment.

Lastly, I noodled for a bit over how to categorize this post. It should be "business" or "technology," but it ended up in "politics." Hopefully politicians won't meddle in this market.

From the "Now I've Seen It All" department

The Unofficial Mac Weblog has this toilet-paper dispenser/iPod dock from Atech.  The first question one should ask is "Why?"  The second question is "How do the speakers sound?"

Chronic of Narnia

For those who haven't seen the SNL rap "Chronic of Narnia," here 'tis:

Just in case the embedded player doesn't work, here's a link.

As much as I enjoyed the books as a youngster, the movie just didn't do it for me.  The first clue that perhaps I wouldn't like the movie came during the in-theater previews, which were all animated films for kids.  Seems the studios and theater owners know their audiences, in this case -- The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe was more of a kids movie.  Lord of the Rings it wasn't.

We should have seen King Kong.

Fabric Keyboard

As Smartphone and PDA screens grow, keyboards
typically shrink. Imagine using your PDA on an airplane table with a
wireless full-sized keyboard. No worries if a pocket of turbulence
spills your coffee on the keyboard -- just throw it in the washing
machine.

That's what a company called Eleksen
offers with its fabric keyboard. After
using it for a few minutes, I can confirm the touch typists will be
much more effective on this than a tiny thumb keyboard. It may not
sport the usual key travel and click, but the slight depression leaves
no doubt when a key is pressed. When done, just roll it up and stuff it
in your computer bag, or even your pocket. It doesn't take up much
space, and it won't break. Connectivity options include Bluetooth and
USB.

Eleksen also uses this technology in
clothing. On display was a ski jacket with music player controls
embedded in the sleeve. No, these "buttons" aren't sewn in or ironed on
-- they're part of the fabric. (The buttons are activated by pressure,
not heat, so gloves can be kept on.) The jacket included a headphone
jack and a microphone built into the collar, and the control unit is
smart enough to pause the music when you answer a call (all via the
sleeve buttons). The picture just doesn't do it justice.

Digital Camera Diatribe

For all the advances in digital photography, the
objectives haven't changed much: make the picture quality equal or
surpass film, and shrink the cameras as much as possible. Progress has
been measured in megapixels of resolution, optical zoom levels, and
storage capacity.

In their quest to duplicate
film camera functionality, digital camera manufacturers haven't taken
advantage of digital capabilities to truly differentiate new products.
This is recognized, however. Yesterday Kodak's CEO Antonio Perez noted
they've been too focused on swapping "silicon for silver."

Slowly,
however, gee-whiz features are creeping into cameras. Last year Kodak
introduced the EasyShare-One, which uses an included Wi-Fi radio to
send pictures from the camera to either a computer on the home network
or Kodak's online EasyShare Gallery. This year Kodak's big CES
announcement was the V570, dubbed as the first dual-lense digital still
camera in the market. One lense is a nice 3x optical zoom (39mm-117mm,
and the other is a 23mm wide angle lens. That wide-angle lens works
with onboard software to take nifty panoramic photos.

Let's
say you're trying to capture a wide scene. Using most cameras, you'd
start on one side (say the left), snap the first picture, locate an
object on the right side of the viewer (maybe a blue house), then
slowly turn your body to the right until that blue house is on the left
side of your viewer. Snap picture number two. Lather, rinse, and repeat
until the entire scene is captured across multiple images. Hopefully
software on your computer can help you crop and stitch the images into
one photo.

The V570, however, simplifies this
process, by previewing that "blue house" on the LCD, then using onboard
software to stitch together what you missed. It'll also adjust lighting
and combine edges to give the finished image a smooth look.

But
this isn't the leap ahead we expect. Hopefully over the next few years
camera manufacturers will declare a truce in the megapixel war and
focus on features.

By the way, I'm often
asked what to look for in digital cameras. I suggest you buy the
smallest one that fits your budget, as a snazzy camera is useless if
it's not handy. Try to get one with an old-fashioned viewing window, so
you can frame pictures when the LCD is washed out by direct sunlight or
the batteries are running low. Make sure the memory card works with
your other devices (my camera, MP3 players, and Smartphone all use SD
cards; the PSP, alas, uses a MemoryStick Pro Duo. Blast you, Sony!).
And take the time to learn an application that eases transferring the
photos into your computer, editing, and sharing. I highly recommend
Google's free Picasa.

Remember Fruit Roll-Ups?

This one is special. Philips is showing a
polymer display that can be rolled up when not in use. Right now it's
greyscale only with a slow, 1-second refresh rate, but I was assured
Philips has color versions in the works, and the refresh rate will
improve enough to handle video.

Applications
of this technology are mind boggling. The picture shows a computer that
rolls up (that's the keyboard on the right -- a fabric one could also
act as a protective sleeve for the entire device). No longer is the
device size limited by the display. Battery life is vastly improved,
too, as power is only used to change, not maintain, pixels. Philips
indicates mobiles using this technology will hit the market in 2007.

VONGO

Since a number of colleagues have asked about the Starz VONGO service, I figured a few comments are in order.

In short, VONGO is a service that downloads movies to a computer and synchronizes them with a portable player.

Sounds
simple, right? Unfortunately, but not surprisingly, the fine print
conspires with business realities to cripple a seemingly compelling
service.

• Computers must run Windows, and have a recent version of Windows Media Player (a free download).



• Only a handful of portable devices support the right DRM (digital rights management).



• Even if one has the right hardware and software, moving content from
  the computer to the player can be excruciating. Ask me for a demo, then
  come back after a few hours to check progress.



• Usage rules can be
  confusing. For example, you may have only 24 hours to finish a movie
  from the time you start it. This isn't so convenient for travelers who
  watch part of a movie on the flight out, and hope to finish on the
  return flight.



• Great content is sparse. Starz does seem to have
  better and more recent movies than, say, CinemaNow, but users are
  limited to the movies currently offered by Starz. Compare those with
  HBO and Showtime. Given that DVD sales represent over half the revenues
  of typical movies, studios aren't too eager to canniabalize their
  primary money maker. Hopefully this will improve as business models are
  worked out (thank you, Apple), but even studio-owned MovieLink has been
  starved for good content in the years since it launched.

Notwithstanding
these limitations, it's hoped Starz can make a go of VONGO. Indeed,
they need successful innovations to differentiate from the likes of
HBO, which attracts subscribers with such stellar original programming
as "Deadwood" and "Entourage."

LCD picture frame

One major advantage of increased LCD
manufacturing capacity is the availability of attractively priced
electronic picture frames. These babies can cycle through a slide show
of your favorite vacation or family photos, which they obtain
wirelessly via your home network, or through an onboard memory card
reader.

Such frames aren't new, but have
often been paired with a clunky, closed subscription service, or just
look too plasticy. What's much more intriguing is a frame on the wall
that's simply an output option of your favorite photo management
application. Send some pictures to your online photo album, some to
your preferred print processor, a few to your home printer, and a bunch
to the LCD frame on the wall in the living room.

Before you whip out your credit card, the frame on the right in this photo, from Art Evolution, carries a suggested retail price of $2,000.

Skype here, Skype there, Skype everywhere

You can't swing a dead cat here without hitting
a Skype phone. In addition to these devices, Skype users benefit from a
much improved user experience. Even Walt Mossberg of the WSJ had good things to say about the service.
Download and try it.

One device is a mouse that, when picked up, is a phone.  This is fine until the caller says "Now click on this link..."

More
than a few people have commented on the outrageous price eBay paid for
Skype, especially when one considers that making it easier for buyers
and sellers to talk may result in lost sales, as they'll complete
transactions offline, depriving eBay of its cut.

Personal Media

While announcements from major media companies,
such as Disney vastly increasing the video content available via iTunes
(how uncomfortable was Keith Jackson directing viewers to download
highlights from iTunes during last night's Rose Bowl?), one mustn't
overlook the proliferation of personally-created content.

Capturing
photos and videos becomes easier every day. Camcorders shrink in size
and price, as solid-state memory replaces tapes and drives (this
improved battery life, too). Although still too clunky for most
consumers, a few digital cameras sport Wi-Fi radios that enable users
to immediately send pictures to their computers or even online albums.
LCD screens on some cameras are big and sharp enough to allow simple
editing, often obviating the need for computers. And new camcorders
finally boast lens quality good enough to perform double duty as still
cameras.

What to do with these photos and
videos once they're in the camera? Commonplace are printers and TVs
with memory card slots, so folks can display their handiwork
immediately. HP expanded its relationship with Snapfish to include
editing and hosting of consumer videos online, in addition to standard
photo tools. Google provides a free video hosting service; finding interesting videos is aided by
Google's popular and powerful search technology.

Many
speculate that the ease with which consumers can create, edit, and
share content will accelerate a shift into the "Long Tail" of media
created by the masses. So the thinking goes, consumers will no longer
have to settle for mass-market entertainment created by a cabal of
major studios and distributed by a handful of networks and cable
companies. The democratization of content!

As
enticing as this looks, especially to one who benefits from increased
usage of the Interent, this observer firmly believes in the value of
artful editing and appropriate aggregation. Sure, the video of the
crazy Christmas light show set to a rockin' Trans-Siberian Orchestra
song was thoroughly enjoyed many times over by this awed fan (as an
aside, the viral power of the Internet was demonstrated by the ranking
of that song #1 by Rhapsody users; heck, Miller Lite even based a
nationally televised commercial on that light show), but nothing (yet)
can replace the entertainment value of top-notch TV shows such as "The
Wire." Yes, we have to rely on the experts at HBO to fund that series,
and we pay the cable company $10 a month for access to that network,
but that's OK -- indeed, one expects to pay for valuable entertainment.

Over
the next few years we can expect far easier access to "Long Tail"
entertainemt. Broadband speeds will increase. Watching
Internet-delivered videos on the TV won't require a 12-year-old hacker
in the family or a $2,000 computer. Finding content tailored to our
needs will be greatly aided by next-generation program guides and
search interfaces. Yet it's doubtful consumers will completely bypass
professionally-programmed networks and established distribution
channels. Rather, they'll dig a bit deeper into the well of
personally-created content. And those that make it simple to create,
share, find, and consume this content will be rewarded.

Mobile Music

Let the press release deluge begin. In no particular order:

Motorola ROKR E2 and iRadio. No, this isn't another iTunes phone,
although the E1 version could be vastly improved. The ROKR E2 plays
MP3s and supports Moto's new iRadio service,
which is comprised of 435 radio channels transmitted via the cellular
network. The E2 also sports an FM tuner, and users can upload songs
with USB 2.0 or a Secure Digital card.

Not to be outdone, Sony Ericsson is showing off the Walkman W810i
(pictured), which now supports Quadband and EDGE, and has dedicated
music buttons in the joystick. The camera boasts 2 megapixels and a
flash. External storage is, of course, a Memory Stick Duo Pro.

Expect to hear a lot from the satellite radio folks, too. (Disclaimer:
I've been a very happy Sirius subscriber for three years.) XM announced
two more portable players that also store songs in MP3 and WMA format.
Samsung manufactures the Helix, while Pioneer is behind the Inno
(pictured).

On the road from CES

Over the next few days I'll be posting from the Consumer Electronics Show in Las Vegas.  As much as I enjoy the gadgets, I'm not looking forward to trudging through 2500 exhibitors with 150,000 of my closest friends.  So on with the comfy shoes -- Vegas, here I come.

 
The glorious Aston-Martin DBR-9 from the Petite Le Mans at Road Atlanta.